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My Diary

Tuesday, 30 June 2009

  • Second chance; who deserves it?


    People tend to ask for second chance when they lost their first chance. Why can't people just appreciate the first chance? And they say, "Humans are born that way; we don't know how to appreciate what we have until we lose it." I don't think that's even a valid reason that everyone deserves a second chance. Let's say everyone deserves a second chance, who could guarantees that the second chance would be a better one? Couldn't it be worse? So, why ask for second chance when you can appreciate what you have in your life right now.

    People often complain:
    My boyfriend/girlfriend is not as good as hers/his.
    My parents don't love me like other siblings.
    My family isn't rich like the others.
    I want to have branded stuff like my friends.
    My job is so sucky and the salary is so low.
    My college is just way too terrible.

    The list goes on.But at least:
    You have someone who loves you.
    You have parents.
    You have family.
    You have the necessities to live.
    You have a job.
    You could still study.

    Appreciate them:
    The people who love and care about you.
    The things you own but many people don't.
    The happiness you have but you don't realize it's presence.

    Every single thing in your life is meant to be appreciated.
    Because you will definitely regret when you lose something you once owned.

    I'm not being philosophical here.
    I just can't stand people asking for second ,third, fourth chance when everyone should make it right at the first chance.

    There's only one life.
    There's no second life.
    There's no second chance.
    Why ask for second chance?

    -faith and freedom comes together-

Friday, 26 June 2009

  • A Trip to Remember: Cameron.

    Because many many many many people have been complaining that I'm updating my blog with stuff that they don't understand and plus, I'm very very very very free right now, I'm going to update about my Cameron trip with 12 other sam pat creatures. Owh, I'm the most normal among all anyway.

    Supposedly, we need to get 20 people to go for this trip but after Sonia and Kathy's endless effort to get more people to go, we only got 14 people to go. Since Ying Ji couldn't make it last minute, we ended up going as a group of 13 people. In other words, I'm trying to say that we have to pay more per person. LOL

    Weird creatures who love to act cute include: Kathy, Kai Jun, Ying Bin, Jason, Xue Yuan, Yu Chen, Sonia, Vin Nie, Jun Jun, Siong Yee, Young Han, Ee Jane.

    So, nothing much happened during the journey to Cameron except that Jason and Sky Didi sang with their 'beautiful' voice and caused the rain to fall. Can you imagine how good is their singing? As good as frogs? Nah, much better than frogs lah.






    Went to Robinson Waterfall and Sonia kept insisting that we are staying at the old house over there. No one believed though. Then, we went to our apartment before going to Pasar Malam at night. I miss the strawberry fried ice. I don't know why but the more I walked, the fuller I got. I believe that I could be thin if I stay in Cameron for half a year. HAHAHA. Anyway, went for steamboat at night but I got stomach ache at the wrong time. :(


     









    And it was Kai Jun a.k.a my Papa's birthday on 20th June. So we celebrated his birthday after 12am. We wanted to wake him up after he's asleep but he's too energetic to sleep. He was still so active when we were all feeling sleepy already. The best thing to do was to make the guys 'rape' him on the sofa while Kathy took the cake out from the fridge. And many things happened after that; I should not mention it here.
     * Koff koff *




    I miss playing "Angels & Demons" all night. :)

    I couldn't sleep all night. I mean in that 2 hours. (5-7am)
    Alarms of weird noises started ringing non-stop.
    Thanks to those pigs who slept at the living room. LOL


    Gay-gay. xD

    Then, we went for breakfast and Rose Farm. Endless camwhore over there, as usual. Then, Strawberry Farm where nobody went in to see. We skipped Butterfly Farm and went to Bee Hive Farm instead. We played Malaysia's largest indoor maze and got ourselves a BIG keychain! xD








     

     



    Owh, I miss the tea farm now.
    I miss the quite-cold-ness in Cameron.
    I miss the midnight game.
    I miss the time we spent there.
     :(







     
    Sonia and Vin Nie, we'll miss you both.
    Nice knowing you two!


    My life began again, the day you took my hand.
    I love you.

    --faith and freedom comes together--

Thursday, 25 June 2009

  • Insignificant Love.

    I was wondering, why do people change without notice?
    At one moment, they say they love you dearly.
    The next moment, they say everything's over.
    Isn't that ridiculous?
    Is love something so insignificant?
    Is memory meant to be erased over and over again?


    I just don't understand.

    -faith and freedom comes together-

Sunday, 21 June 2009

  • ADFP Night:Picture Perfect.

    ADFP Night,a picture post.
    Enjoy.
    :)

     =) 080

    =) 042

    =) 064

    =) 060

     =) 056 =) 055 =) 055 =) 052 =) 053

    =) 061

     =) 051 =) 049 =) 045

    =) 068 =) 066 =) 073 =) 075 =) 077 =) 078 =) 081

    =) 047

    =) 057

    =) 057

    For more pictures, view them in my Facebook photo album.
    This isn't the full album.
    Some SS photos have been removed though.
    HAHAHA.

    Cameron trip was great.
    Will update about it soon if I am hardworking enough to do so.
    I'm just too lazy to blog nowadays.
    Plus, I'm very tired.

    Mummy: You really went to Cameron meh? Why didn't say anything to me one?
    Me: Didn't go Cameron then go where wo? I'm just too tired to talk. HAHA
    Mummy: *Speechless*

    Econs test is on Wednesday but I haven't study yet.
    I don't want to die so soon. >.<

    Owh, Happy Father's Day to my Papa 1 and Papa 2.XD

    -faith and freedom comes together-

Thursday, 18 June 2009

  • ADFP Night Sneak Preview

    ADFP Night has finally over. It was really a great night and I believe that the committees did a really good job to have this night move smoothly. I'm glad that L.A's music video actually won because I love their video to bits; it's so meaningful. =]

    I hate Facebook when I need to upload plenty of pictures.
    I took 2 hours to upload 60 photos. =.=

    I'm supposed to go out today but I didn't. I ended up doing my Psychology research thingy. Half way doing it, I realized that I'm having flu. And coincidentally, Mummy was reading about Influenza A's news, so she started giving me advice. Plus, I'm going to Cameron Highlands tomorrow. Yes, I've changed my mind again because it's just 2D1N instead of 3D2N. Why? This Sunday is Father's Day wert. LOL.


     
      
    Sneak Preview.
    More to come soon.
    Because Xanga's connection is sucky too.
    ;)

    -faith and freedom comes together-

Sunday, 14 June 2009

  • Breathe Slow.

    I'm running out of patients cause I can't believe
    What the hell I'm hearing
    And speaking of hell
    It don't compare to this heat that I am feeling

    I love you too much
    It shows, all my emotions go
    Out of control
    When I can hardly see
    From the tears that flow

    Can't forget to breathe slow
    Count from one to ten
    With my eyes closed
    Cause ladies take it in
    And get comp oh oh oh sure
    Before I lose it get composure
    I am gonna breathe slow
    Count from one to ten
    With my eyes closed
    Cause ladies take it in
    And get composure
    Ladies never lose composure

    Not gonna lie
    Or even try
    You've got my wheel spinning
    And I ain't the one to show
    The gun, cause that means you will be winning


    Seems as though I've been updating my blog with lyrics but there's no proper post. I find lyrics helpful in updating my blog though; they explain my feelings so well. =]

    Anyway, I had been thinking a lot for the last few days. In fact, I was thinking too much and I felt so lost after that. I'll just be emotional after that. I know that would happen but sometimes, human just do things unconsciously [most of the time, according to Sigmund Freud.LOL]. But I do think it's normal at this stage of life according to Erikson's theory: the Identity vs. Role Confusion state. Forgive me, my mind is filled with Psychology because I'm taking the last test this Wednesday. I hope it will be the last because I don't want to take the fourth test, if possible. Cutting the crap off, I found the answer to all my doubts yesterday night. So, I found my identity instead of being role-confused! Double yay~

    "Sometimes I really don't know what to do in hostel. I'm always bored."
    "Go pak toh lo."
    "Got no one to date."
    "Simply find someone to date then."
    "I think the guys in this entire world won't be enough for me."
    HAHAHAHA.
    -Just a random conversation between my Mummy and I-

    It's Daddy's birthday tomorrow.
    Father's Day will be next week.
    That means I'd be broke by next week.
    And I've decided not to go for the Cameron trip.

    Event coming up next: ADFP Night.

    -faith and freedom comes together-

Friday, 12 June 2009

  • Forever and Always.


    Once upon a time

    I believe it was a Tuesday
    When I caught your eye
    We caught onto something
    I hold onto the night
    You looked me in the eye
    And told me you loved me

    Were you just kidding?

    Cause it seems to me
    This thing is breaking down
    We almost never speak
    I don't feel welcome anymore
    Baby what happened
    Please tell me cause one second it was perfect
    Now you're halfway out the door

    And I stare, at the phone
    He still, hasn't called
    And you feel so low you can't feel, nothing at all
    And you flashback to when he said
    Forever and always

    Oh, and it rains in your bedroom, everything is wrong
    It rains when you're here and it rains when you're gone
    Cause I was there when you said
    Forever and always

    Was I out of line? Did I say something way to honest?
    Did you run and hide like a scared little boy?
    I looked into your eyes, thought I knew you for a minute
    Now I'm not so sure

    So here's to everything
    Coming down to nothing
    Here's to silence
    That cuts me to the core
    Where is this going?
    Thought I knew for a minute but I don't anymore

    Back off, baby back off
    Did you forget everything?
    Back up, baby back up
    Did you forget everything?

    Didn't mean it baby
    Said forever and always

    I believe memories are not meant to be forgotten but to be cherished,
    no matter what has happened between us.

    -faith and freedom comes together-

Saturday, 06 June 2009

  • I'm Not Giving Up on You.


     I asked people, "Can I give up?"
    They said...
    No, because I believe that you could do it.
    No, because you will be happy when you'd gone through everything.
    No, because you might lose out many opportunities that you could have.
    Yes, because I'm just playing. =.=

    There are many more reasons that people gave me.
    I was really confused yesterday night.
    And now I think I know what I want.
    Thanks everyone, who have helped me to go through the confusion state.
    I appreciate it. :)



    I finally got to meet with Linda and my dear Sheh Yee yesterday after such a long time. It might be a really short time but I'm happy enough. Although I got frozen in the cinema, I'm still glad. Thanks dear for fetching me! :) Next date would be our anniversary of don't know what;18th June. No matter what, we need to go out that day. I don't care! HAHAHA.

    And this week, I had only two hours of class but I did not go back home. Why? All because of the Concerto thingy. I'm damn proud of myself that I stayed in sauna Akasia for four nights; it's the longest that I have stayed during this semester. But I still have no idea how are we going to finish the costumes and the backgrounds on time.

    ADFP Night is next week and I did not buy a new dress this time because I'm lazy to get one. I go shopping for casual clothes that I could wear anytime at anywhere but I don't bother looking at the prom night dresses. Geez. I said I bertaubat for not shopping yesterday. I really didn't buy anything yesterday! Because I didn't see anything nice. HAHAHA. Counted as bertaubat also lah.

    Psychology Test on Monday.
    I'm done reading them.
    Whee...!!!


    Kathy, this reminds me of you. HAHA

    P/S: I'm lazy to blog about outing these days. If not, I have to blog too often. :)

    -faith and freedom comes together-

Sunday, 31 May 2009

  • Complicated.

    I was shocked when my Mummy told me that my uncle passed away yesterday. What's weird is that I dreamt that someone passed away in my dreams. I felt uncomfortable and weird at the same time. Anyway, may my uncle RIP.

    My brother was extremely happy when I say, "Hey, let's play badminton."
    My brothers lost to me in Saidina yesterday.I made them bankrupt. :D
    I miss childhood moments; I love being around my siblings, playing all the time.

    All of a sudden, my brother asked me,
     "Will you miss me when I'm not around; you won't get to see me from day to night when you're home?"
    I hesitated and answered "No."
    But it was actually the opposite.
    LOL.

    Isn't it weird that at one time, many guys would go after you because they know that you had just broken up? The matter gets worse when you actually like one of them without knowing whether it's love or not. Because of the fact that you don't understand what's love at this heartbroken moment, you are afraid to enter the Love Road again. You are afraid to get hurt but again, another half of your mind says, "Let's give it a try and you'll be happy." Isn't that complicated?


    I'm just avoiding after all.
    Can somebody help me?
    Sigh.

    I will be your star and you will be my moon.
    I will always watch over you.
    =]

    -faith and freedom comes together-


LiL_MeL91

  • Visit LiL_MeL91's Xanga Site
    • Name: MeLaNiE
    • Country: Malaysia
    • Birthday: 8/8/1991
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 12/16/2004

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= Strictly No Bitchings =
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Simply leave a comment in any weblog post as anonymous unless you have a Xanga account.
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Enjoy.

Break The Ice

Hi, my name is depressed emo freak.
I love black, slitting my wrist, being a homosexual, the usual.
I don't eat, and I live inside my room.

One of my favorite poems is the following:
"I'm going to draw a picture, a picture with a twist; I'll draw it with a razorblade; I'll draw it on my wrist."

Okay,I'm just kidding.Heh.

Here's the truth.
I believe in FAITH.
Ordinary girl.
Loud.
Just me after all,
May Yin.
=D

-You Know You Love Me-
XOXO
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