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My Diary

Sunday, 15 November 2009

Beautiful Rainbow.

I'm seriously proud of myself because i spent less than RM500 this holiday, so far. I'm also very proud of myself because I'm finally back to my healthy lifestyle of sleeping and waking up early as well as daily exercises. I'm also very very proud of myself because I clean the house everyday; Mummy's leg is seriously in pain and she deserves to do less house chores although she's still doing most of them. Say you're proud of me too, alright? =]

Singapore's plan has been canceled.
Cherating plan is still in progress.
Family trip is on.
Kawan-kawan trip is still in progress.

And I really hate people who call scholars nerd because of a hasty generalization:
SCHOLAR MUST BE A NERD.
SO, ALL OF THEM ARE NERDS.
Go jump to the sea, okay?
I hope critical thinking course could help you people.
But if it's too serious, still it's better for you to jump to the sea.
Dumb.

Ignore that part if you are not involved in it. I've been watching Queen of No Marriage everyday and I really love the story plus the actor. Good looking until I can't take my eyes off him. xD But I do learn a lot from that drama. There may be trillions of people all over the world but for two people to be together, it's fated and destined. That's why a relationship should be appreciated no matter what the ending might be. Nice.

Now, everyone's into the news that the world's gonna end in 2012.
And a conversation popped up.
Mummy says, "If the world's going to really end in 2012, what would you do?"
I say, "I'm going to do many many things which I haven't done and I will try my very best to make things work out."
Mummy replies, "I guess I'll just wait and die."
Sister says, "Of course lah. You did so many things already. We haven't even get married and have children yet."

We laughed and I thought about this. When we reach a different age, we have different viewpoint because our level of life keeps increasing and our experience level gains higher as well. Each challenge in life creates a different color of rainbow. If there's no challenge at all, imagine what color will your rainbow be? Maybe you won't even have a rainbow but a white light, photon? LOL.

That's why, I've decided to kick love aside and move on with my own life.
I wanna draw a beautiful rainbow.
Yay~
♥

Sometimes we wish for the better
When we have it good as it gets
Sometimes the grass isn't greener
As soon as we find out, we forget
Sometimes the strong, ain't always so strong
Sometimes a girl is gon' be a girl
She don't want to deal with all the drama in your world
So, I'm sorry for the stupid things
I wish I didn't do but I do.

-faith and freedom comes together-

Tuesday, 03 November 2009

Damn. Repetititions.

I'm back, humans!
I know my blog was so dead for quite some time but do not blame the owner of the blog because I, myself could not help it. LOL.

Anyway, I'm finally having a long long long break after many many many problems which many many many people didn't know, after many many many works to do, after many many many exams which I think I flunked them all, after many many many sleepless nights, after many many many many many many days without shopping, after many many many many many many emofying days, after many many many many many many karaoke-less days, and after many many many many many many many happenings.

And here I am, typing MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY MANY.
=.=

I ♥ shopping.
I ♥ sleeping.
I ♥ spending.

I want to go sing sing sing.
I want to go sleep sleep sleep.
I want to go buy buy buy.
I want to go play play play.
I want to go date date date.
Blueks!

I don't know what the hell am I updating right here.
Next time, maybe? =]
Have a nice day!

-faith and freedom comes together-

Saturday, 10 October 2009

A part of me is always gonna love you, but I can't stay~

Still a little hope left in my brain
You always got me thinking we might strike a match relight the flame
We both know it's never gonna be the same
So for this love to end we can't stay friends
Cause we're always gonna feel this way

And it's so hard
Cause a part of me is always gonna love you, but I can't stay

I can't take it no more
It's getting too bad
Surrender all we're fighting for
And all we have
Cut the strings we left attached
So you can't pull me back

Time we stopped talking for a while
And turn these tears into smiles
Cause i can't see you without crying
We need a day break
So when I see your face
You know I won't be lying
And it's so hard
Cause a part of me is always gonna love you, but I can't stay
I can't take it no more
It's getting too bad
Surrender all we're fighting for
And all we have
Cause the strings we left attached
So you can't pull me back
If we give the time to heal this
We might work it out
But there's no way that we could fix this
With how we are right now

♥

-faith and freedom comes together-

Thursday, 24 September 2009

You're only in my memory, not a part of my life.

Millions of people block one another in MSN.
I'm not surprised about it.
Millions of people hate one another out there.
I'm not surprised about it.
Millions of people fall in love each day.
I'm not surprised about it.
Millions of couples break up each day.
I'm not surprised about it.

Millions of people may be blocking me in MSN and hating me.
And you, being one of them, I'm not surprised about it.

Someone said I'm flirting a lot in Facebook,
it hurts him a lot.
And I said, "That's my purpose."
It's not that I like doing that.
Maybe someday you'll understand.

Struggling.But.I.Am.Moving.On.
Not comma, not semi colon, but a FULL STOP,
to stop being a fool.

-faith and freedom comes together-

Wednesday, 16 September 2009

Taste of Sweetness, out of Bitterness.

I'm finally free after weeks of endless examinations, tests, quizzes, lab reports, assignments and presentation. Yes, endless. That means I have to study non-stop and being depressed over it non-stop but Facebook was never stopped. =.=

I wanted to change my major to Marine Biology before this but now I'm sticking with Biotechnology because I'm too lazy to write a letter to JPA for approval to change major. List of universities should be sent to OSSP by tomorrow and I'm not done with the research yet. I want to go North Carolina Chapel Hill if I could.That's the top of my choices so far but the percentage of admission is only 34%.Sigh.

I'm not your one and only love,
because I don't deserve to be yours.

I want to go back home for Raya!
I need to celebrate Raya also,right?
1Malaysia wert.
Oh,and I hope INTEC is one of the schools to have holiday on Friday.

I need a break, seriously.
Because I need to face exams, tests, quizzes,assignments and a documentary all over again once I'm back to INTEC.

If I could experience isolation from everything,
you'll see a better me.
Don't say that I think too much, because I did not.

I love the song, Ji Muo Ai Qing Bu Luo Ge by Cynthia Wang.
♥

-faith and freedom comes together-

Wednesday, 09 September 2009

Was it All that Easy?

I don't know why the hell am I so emotional now.
Sometimes I'd rather be the one who got hurt than to be the one who hurts someone.

I'd never felt this bad before.
I'd never felt this guilty before.
I'd never felt this undecided before.

Every day and night, I wish upon the star that you'll be alright.
I wish you'd be happier off without me.
I really wish that it will come true someday.

I tried to hold on but it hurts too much.
"Let go if it hurts so much to keep holding on."
Was it all that easy?
Or was it me who didn't want to let go?

People think I'm moving on very well alone.
I like that thought,
because that's my intention.
But I'm only human, with feelings.
I could get tired too.
And I am tired now.

Just let me rant in my blog;
I can't talk to anyone about it.

You may blame everything on me.
You may hate me all you want.
But do take note that I still care.

-faith and freedom comes together-

Saturday, 05 September 2009

I had to leave, I have to live~

Time will bring the real end of our trial
One day they'll be no remnants
No trace, no residual feelings within you
One day you won't remember me

Your face will be the reason I smile
But I will not see what I cannot have forever
I'll always love ya, I hope you feel the same

Oh you played me dirty, your game was so bad
You toyed with my affliction
Had to fill out my prescription
Found the remedy, I had to set you free

Away from me
To see clearly the way that love can be
When you are not with me
I had to leave, I have to live
I had to lead, I had to live

If I can't have you, let love set you free
To fly your pretty wings around
Pretty wings, your pretty wings
Your pretty wings around

-faith and freedom comes together-

Tuesday, 01 September 2009

Blame it on Me.

I can't give you what you want,
And it's killing me,
And I'm starting to see,
Maybe we're not meant to be.
-faith and freedom comes together-

Thursday, 27 August 2009

Human Mold is Growing in Me!

My one week mid-semester break is like making my brain and body rotten like those bread molds growing on the bread with the presence of water and air. But my factors are different as in replacing the water and air with desktop and television. They are making me rotten in and out.

I tried to study and yeah, at least I studied one chapter of Biology and a page of Chemistry and not a single touch on C++, the subject I'm worst in and Calculus YET. TWO Biology reports and TWO Chemistry reports are enough to take my life but there's another CTES assignment on Egypt Civilization to take my underworld life as well. Killing me is useless too because I can't reincarnate anymore. I'm going to be a ghost to haunt everyone who made my life miserable.

BEWARE.
HAHAHAHAHA.

Okay,okay. I shall stop crapping.
Let me share something interesting.
I was watching a Korean ghost movie last two days, at night. It was quite horrifying in the beginning and well, it's quite interesting. But it's the first ever ghost movie that made me cry;I did not cry because I was scared but I cried because it was sad.OMG. And it's the first ever ghost movie that has a really happy ending. I told you it's interesting, very interesting indeed.

Uhm, my grandmother broke her right leg last week as she fell down and everyone was worried sick. But thank God, she was healthy enough to undergo surgery and she's well now.
=]

Till then, have a nice day.
:)

-faith and freedom comes together-

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LiL_MeL91

- Name: MeLaNiE
- Country: Malaysia
- Birthday: 8/8/1991
- Gender: Female
- Member Since: 12/16/2004

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Break The Ice

Hi, my name is depressed emo freak.
I love black, slitting my wrist, being a homosexual, the usual.
I don't eat, and I live inside my room.

One of my favorite poems is the following:
"I'm going to draw a picture, a picture with a twist; I'll draw it with a razorblade; I'll draw it on my wrist."

Okay,I'm just kidding.Heh.

Here's the truth.
I believe in FAITH.
Ordinary girl.
Loud.
Just me after all,
May Yin.
=D

-You Know You Love Me-
XOXO